When gnats bite

It hurts. It actually does.
When I run my fingers
across my skin, like
sun burn, searing, stinging,
screaming pain.
I flinch.
The tablets taste like
earth. Earth and
sore memories of
childhood and this
realisation I am alone.
And oh god I am hungry,
I tell myself tomorrow
I will chart it up
remind myself to eat
between the empty
stomachs, I crave
the dinners of yesteryear;
Roast chicken
cauli cheese, roast tatties,
baby peas, followed
by homemade rice
pudding, I dreamt
about rice pudding
its sweet sticky
milk whilst curled
up watching Only Fools
or Open all hours
with a blankie,
tea and biscuits
surrounded by that
safe silence that
says pause child, pause.

Karen Hayward ©2018

Image found via WordPress library

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