I am not lost.

I’ll draw on my skin the colour of my soul let the flames flicker at my eyes. My skin bare, soft porcelain. My hair a tangled mess of passion. My fingers intertwining with the unknown. In that moment you will see truth as my spirit searches for its desire. Satan will grin as temptation overcomes my being, for he knows, when the days end I will repent my sins and tell Metatron of the loves I felt, the desires I have known, the passions that have burned, and he will write them down for he still recalls the flutter of a thousand wings as blood rushes through the soul.

Karen Hayward © 2016.

Post about your zodiac sign and whether or not it fits you. 30 day writing challenge.

Soooo, I was born on what they call a cusp. this means (for me) my birthday falls on the change between Scorpio and Sagittarius. November 22nd, some horoscopes mark me as Sagittarius and others as Scorpio, although mainly Scorpio. Many years ago just after my first real relationship broke down after a few years together I went to see a medium, at the time I was feeling very lost and this wonderful lady correctly identified (no info was given at this point) that I was a cusp baby and correctly identified which two signs. She then took a moment, smiled and said Scorpio is your dominant sign but people should never underestimate the Sagittarius in you. This was back in my early twenties, 21/22 I think, and now having aged, developed, grown and become I can say with confidence she is right. I am a Scorpio but I will always surprise you with my Sagittarius wandering.

So how would I describe myself according to my zodiac sign?

So I googled personality traits of these two signs and this is what I found. Scorpio and Sagittarius.

Scorpio’s are strong willed and know how to grab the limelight effortlessly!!!…no comment :).

Sagittarius, optimistic and always look on the bright side of things. Hell yeah 🙂

Scorpio, magnetic charm that cannot be ignored….lol again, no comment!

Sagittarius,  speak the brutal truth, and they always mean what they say. Their comments can, however, sometimes be too harsh and may hurt other people. This is sadly true.

If a Scorpio-born has decided on something, it’s almost impossible to divert them from their path. Yep, t’is very true.

Sagittarius, they are intelligent and enthusiastic people, always interested in different kinds of subjects and can easily impress others with their conversation. What can I say to this, I am simply amazing :).

The Scorpio-born will never lose their sleep over disruptive times and failures. The Scorpio will take it head on regardless how difficult the situation may seem. This one I would say is only partly true, yes I will always take things head on, but that isn’t to say that i’m not affected by them, cos I am, cos I am human after  all. 🙂

The Sagittarius-born people are philosophical and have a strong sense of right and wrong. Oh God yes!!! I do have a strong sense of right and wrong and this often leads me into trouble because I rarely agree with the majority and I refuse to follow the herd if I believe them to be in the wrong.

The Scorpio-born are jovial and passionate. I’m not sure it’s my place to say whether I am like this, it seems a little big headed to suggest that have these types of personality traits. But yes, I am a very jovial (happy and cheerful) person and I do loves me a bit of passion!

Large hearted, these people are very generous. Hmm again not sure it’s my place to say.

The Scorpio-born are trustworthy and faithful. It’s great to have a faithful Scorpio around. He will always stand by you if he has promised he would. Okay so I will be honest here, it all comes down to that promise. If I promise something, then I can whole heartedly be trusted on it, i will do everything within my means to keep that promise. But, if I never promised and you never asked me to then that’s a different thing.

The Sagittarius-born people are adventurous. They will never shy away from taking risks to keep the excitement alive. This one is interesting as it really depends on what you see as adventurous. Will I go on a roller coaster with you…hell fucking no!!!

Power, position and money are the key motivators for a Scorpio. The Scorpio are an ambitious lot. They will aim for the stars and will ensure that they reach there. This is interesting trait that I often feel battles alongside the Sagittarius element of my personality. Power means nothing to me, although every job i’ve had I have very quickly climbed the ladder which suggests power means more than I realise.

The Scorpio-born are lead by their instincts and they take the right decisions at an opportune time. They are so intuitive that they can easily read the mind of other people. Yep, just yep.

Negative traits, what the hell there’s a section called negative traits, this must be wrong I am sure I have no negative traits! Okay here goes into the darkside!

Sagittarius, Their careless approach to life attracts criticism from everyone. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA ….Whatever!

The Scorpio tend to be extremely possessive and jealous. And the jealousy more often than not disturbs their relationships and affects their peace of mind. Hmmm, maybe sometimes, although I think thanks to my Sagittarius traits I can keep jealousy at bay…sometimes.

Sagittarius, their honesty can sometimes be too brutal, which hurts others. Okay, this is true and to all those people that I have brutally hurt over the years seriously I am sorry. But the thing is if someone doesn’t pull me up and say to me that was brutal then I wont see it and cant fix it. The truth is I never mean to be brutal and i never mean to be hurtful…so please if my words have caused an achey, tell me so I can fix it.

They find it extremely difficult to trust people and are therefore very secretive. The Scorpio will not let people easily know what’s going on in their mind or life. Oh that’s too funny! Whatever!

Sagittarius, restless and impatient. Maybe a little.

The Scorpio are very sensitive and can get hurt easily by negative treatment and comments. This one unfortunately is very true, I take more to heart than people realise :(.

Manipulative and domineering as they are, Scorpio-born have a knack of getting things done their way.…is giggling!

Okay so there you go, I am a combination of two, but as with all things in life we are whoever the hell we choose to be.


Karen Hayward ©2015




World domination in a tiara and sparkly crown.

Your biggest mistake,
And there have been many,
was to under estimate me,
My strength when I am down,
My ability to rise through the darkest mist,
My desire to survive,
My desire to be happy,
To feel happy
To live happy.
Your biggest mistake,
Was that you never saw me.
Now my wings out spread,
Ready to fly,
The materialistic creatures
mean nothing to me,
I’ve left those dreams behind,
I’m ready,
to make

Please tick as appropriate.

Do not define me
under some useless title
used by society to
dictate the supposed behavioural habits of an individual soul.
I am me,
I do  not fit beneath a title,
I am a title
All of my own,
I defy your rules
I defy your terms,
I create.
I create new ways,
New rules, new terms,
I create a new definition
By which to let my soul live.
So stop trying to define,
The indefinable,
I am not a county or country or town,
I am in love with words with pictures, I am not a genre, or a taste or a type,
I don’t follow the hype,
I follow my heart,
It’s a great place to start,
I am free,
stop defining me.