The chaotic thoughts of creative mind.

I write,
Not for fame,
Or the hope of one day seeing my name
Scrawled across the cover of an unnamed book.
I write,
So that i can see, i can look,
At the chaotic thoughts
That get caught
Up in my mind.
No thought gets left unseen,
The good, the bad and the in between.
My mind works so fast,
no scenario slips past.
The wrongs the rights,
The dark and the light.
Every choice,
Every voice,
The what ifs, yeah buts,
Every posable rut.
Sometimes, I follow my gut,
and depend on good luck,
but even then,
I’ve thought about when,
Why, how,
Even now.
I can tell you the thought process,
On every angle of my lifeless
Life.
No decisions are made on a whim,
I look deep, never skim,
Consider me, consider this,
Is it something i would miss.
I make my choice,
Knowing i will lose my voice,
I’d make it again,
so It wasn’t in vain.
Every decision is well thought out,
Never
A
Choice,
i didn’t think hard about.

© Karen, A. Hayward.

I commited the ultimate crime,
It was time,
I put you in a box,
And turned the lock,
It wasn’t right,
Nor bright,
But it holds your words
Out of sight.
It didn’t stop,
The lid went pop.
And they got out,
And they remind
Me
About…

So the box is gone,
Which might be wrong,
Or
It could be
The catalyst,
That makes me strong.
The bars are gone,
Defences down,
You can move freely around,
My battered mind,
A curious find.

Flowers in my deepest thoughts.

I’ve never really liked
My thoughts,
Cloaked in darkness,
I always fought,
To stay away from
Their deep despair,
To never like,
to never care.
But now i think,
I will not sink,
Deep inside
Thoughts open wide,
With no where to hide,
They question why
It is, that i never cry.
why, i always try,
and never give up,
Eye always on the final cup.
And in amongst the sharpest thorns,
Little flowers grow, smothering the scorn.

Familiar dark secrets and hidden shadows.

There are times, when it feels,
As if you have already
Tapped into my mind,
It feels as if you’ve already
Seen my darkest corners,
Touched my hidden shadows.
Walked through my every thought,
And found the things i sought.
like a familiar presence
Searching for the essence
And knowing
Exactly
Where to
look.