purgatory

Were you the rose quartz of my existence

radiating the heart aura of pure spirituality,

were you love? Were you the silent whisper

behind my wings as I spread them and

flew into unchartered territories?

Hush, listen now,

I hear no angelic melody for I am alone at the

verge of forever.

Were you the essence of all that is pure

the transcendence of celestial energy

caressing my soul aeons through space and time?

Rhetorical ponderings.

Life is in the now, here within these shells,

the evolution of existence is reliant

upon us living, eternity is beyond our

scope and need not be considered.

Were you love?

Did you cocoon me from the haunting

callous reality of fantasies weakened

by a misplaced immunity and reluctance to grow,

the scars that weave through my beating heart say no.

Yet still I feel the residue of your essence as you step back,

and back,

I wonder do you see the cliff edge beneath

your running feet and when you fall,

will I reach out my blood soaked hands to catch you.

Lost souls touching in the darkness,

igniting ancient memories and as our last breath

leaves our body we shall recount these seconds

in the endless time of universal law,

feeling the scent of mortality upon our translucent skin,

tasting the epiphany of lust as we swim through

the countless faces of our past,

our future,

and we shall watch in trepid horror our impact

upon these innocent atoms and perhaps

we shall discover eternity is not ours to dream off

for we are the fallen,

the dark realms of nothing whisper our names

across constellations of the long forgotten

fields of life scattered across time,

and there beyond the edge we shall

rot for days far beyond eternity.

I don’t want to spend an eternity in purgatory.

I don’t want to look back with my dying breath

and wonder was I ever loved beyond the flesh.

Satan is an iconic creation of freewill, God

iconic of rules, I can abide neither. My conscience

whispers, my intuition screams, my soul ever the

playful creature explores and my spirit rots. I am

too dark for the light, too light for the dark, neither

world will take me. My heart has a weakness, my soul

has a darkness and I am lost in a devils world. The

empty void of existence a heavy burden in which

to carry, the night calls my name in shame and

the day whispers the secret stench of testing times

that I fail, again and again. The tight rope has become a thin

wire stretched out as far as the eye can see no sun reaches it,

no moon touches it, it is purgatory. I am in purgatory for

my sins.

Tag: purgatory

Rose quartz of my existence.