A strangers deja vu.

You resemble a 3d image straight of the cover of the new look catalogue.
Killer boots elevating your ego,
that symbolic clinking across the tiles with an air of ownership two steps behind the tail of your coat trailing the dream.
Your blank stare searches the shop for someone, you need someone, anyone, to scream your name in a show of merciless identity.
No one does.
So you follow the dull looking guy beside you.
You’re together, but separate.
You’re a looker, so very pretty.
The camel coloured coat that skims your shins and is tied only by a belt belongs to a lady, perhaps a couple of sizes larger than yourself too.
The clinking heels tell me you are short, still growing.
The makeup a daring act.
He enters the shop as you hover outside, no bag on your arm, no possessions of adulthood.
You are a kid, 13 maybe trying out the adult world for size, you are drowning in the symbolic clothing.
He hands you your smokes.
The token reward, you follow him home.
I am living a strangers deja vu, I pray that arch angel Michael still resides in those dank rooms of despair as you tread the concrete path, left, pass the urine stained phone boxes and left again.
I wonder if Bernie ever died and who watches over the broken now.

Karen Hayward ©2016.

Thoughts of an ancient heart.

Sometimes,
things pop into my head,
Things that I have done,
Things that I have said.
I wonder why they were,
What led me to that choice,
why all of a sudden,
I raised my gentle voice.
What was it that I saw,
I ask myself again,
Eyes firmly on the floor,
when you were a simple name.
Or was it in the words,
That fell upon my mind,
What was it that I heard,
to recognise my kind.
And if it wasn’t what I saw,
and it wasn’t what I heard,
Then what made me open up,
That broken, battered door.
So I think about it all,
What led me through the days,
What left me feeling muddled,
In an unknown haze.
And that’s when I see,
It wasn’t what I saw,
It wasn’t what you said,
It was the recognition,
of an ancient memory,
Deep inside my head.

Awards-seven things all about me!

angel awardvibaward

 

Ohhhh I have been a very lucky gal just lately and have managed to be nominated for two amazing awards. The first ‘Inspiring us 1 blog at a time, Angel award’ is by the lovely and amazingly energetic blogger Flippyzipflop

http://flippyzipflop.wordpress.com/2014/08/05/awards-much-deserved/#more-1050…..I’m not technoligically minded enough to be certain that this ping back malarky is actually gonna work! I have absolutely Jack shit to do in response to this amazing award, except to say thank you, it is much appreciated, I can choose, if I like to reblog it on, and that is actually my choice. I choose to send this award out to every single blog that I follow here on wordpress. I follow you because in some way you inspire, enlighten or entertain me, you all deserve the award.

My second award (seriously can you tell it’s the school holidays, i’m so far behind, if anyone has a few hours and a couple of pairs of hands they’d like to lend me then please, send them my way!) ‘Very inspiring blogger award.’ is nominated by Jemverse, another amazing blog but with the added advantage of great pictures along side the poetry! Thank you for nominating my blog, hell, thank you for even reading my blog!

http://jemverse.wordpress.com/2014/08/12/inspirational/

 

To qualify for the ‘Very inspiring blogger award.’ I do have to share seven things about myself…..

  1. I don’t like people that lie, pretend, fabricate or recreate the truth. Honesty is a simple act. Ask me anything and i’ll always tell the truth, the key of course is in asking the right questions.
  2. I love, love. There I said it, beneath my tough exterior I am a complete romantic. I love, love stories, love songs, love poems, I love too see love, I love too hear love, but most of all I actually love to give love.
  3. I am a cold blooded person. Completely, even now in the middle of summer i’m in a jumper. Pretty much all year round I am cold, always cold, my fingers, toes, hands, feet, my entire body is cold. Sometimes (last night) even in the summer I take a hot water bottle to bed with me, I crave heat for comfort on the nights when I am just soooo cold.
  4. I do not know a complete line of any of the songs that I sing. I sing them anyway making up the words as I go along. It goes something like this….(i’ll just go and see what my last youtube song was and we’ll take it from there.) bleurgh it was Snow Patrol Run, says it all at the moment, i’ll go choose another, in fact holy fuck why does Youtube feel the need to keep a list of what songs i’ve been listening to! Ok, I don’t even know what this song is called but it is one of those ones that I sing constantly, when i’m out, in, lining up, probably even when i’m sleeping! ‘I dont wanna dance, dance with me baby no more, your a fucking waste of time, ive got a feeling thats fine, a feeling thats fine….repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat. You get the idea! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9de6jeOevi8
  5. My dream destination, the one place that my soul actually aches to go to is America. Route 66, not on some stupid tour led by an under paid worker though. I want to go with friends, real friends, a lover maybe too, I don’t know, I just know I want people that I love along side me, people that will see the beauty, the curiousness, the intrigue, the ugly, the unique, the different and the amazing, that I see.
  6. I hate flavoured anything! And oh my goodness I hate it when shops think it is ok to put normal flavoured chocolate next to mint or orange flavoured chocolate, seriously guys that flavour seeps through and completely ruins my chocolate, ruins my day, ruins my life. It is like poison on my tongue. I love dairy milk chocolate, vanilla ice cream, water…basically I like anything that is not flavoured. ohhhh and I hate flavoured, flavoured stuff, you know that horrid fake strawberry flavour they stick into sweets, poison!
  7. I am not afraid. I am not afraid to be different. I am not afraid to stand up alone and defend someone, something, anything that I believe in. I have stood alone for most of my life, I’ve made good friends with my shadow.

The rules.

  • Thank the person who nominated you.
  • Add the “Very Inspiring Blogger Award” logo to your post.
  • Share 7 things about yourself.
  • Nominate 15 bloggers who inspire you.
  • Include the set of rules.
  • Let your nominees know by posting a comment on his/her blog or including a ping back.

 

My 15 nomineees are….going to have to wait, so for now, I am nominating every single blogger that stops to read this post,why? because we all inspire one another in different ways, so we all deserve the award!