A core deep flaw

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I fought all things taught
all lessons learned all battle
wounds earned. And yet,
here I am, the corner begging
my company, reflection caught
upon the forced crimson pause.
A reflective stance, a core
deep flaw. Strip bare the
necessities of life, remove
my destructive Armour and
I am weak, whole without value.
How will you love me if I calm
the fires that flame upon your
words? Oh! To discover I still
hold harbour to such fears.
Such scars beyond deep,
we learn, learned behaviour,
echo, mimic and resurrect the
the dark shadows of our existence.
We are a reflective stance
of inner needs, nourishment,
eternally perhaps feeding from
each other’s energy, an unstoppable
cycle rotating across our very own axis.

Karen Hayward ©2019 Image via wordpress library

Only letters.

image

Give me back the blank canvas and let my thoughts swarm into the emptiness. Take my hand and we’ll walk in those autumn leaves that we created back when we teetered on the tight rope of lost innocence. Walk with me through my mind and know the whirlwind of confusion that swirls like the ebbing tide of a thunderous ocean.  I have only random letters and weakness at every turn.

Karen Hayward ©2016

Share something you struggle with. 30 day writing challenge.

  • Burning the porridge.
  • Sleeping for more than a couple of hours.
  • Being cold.
  • Watching football.
  • Cold baths
  • Brushing my hair when there’s a tuggy!
  • Flavored chocolate, oh dear God why would they do that and even worse why then place mint/ orange chocolate next to normal chocolate do they not realise that flavor seeps through into my delicious chocolate!
  • Being loved..I can love others with ease, I just don’t see when others love me, so seriously peeps, placard marker pen and stick it in my face a million times…even then can’t promise i’ll see it!
  • People not treating my daughter right!
  • Mean people!
  • Too much noise.
  • Not being clumsy!
  • Being told what to do!
  • Life, at times!

I wrote this as a bullet list because I couldn’t settle on one single thing that I struggle with. The truth is I struggle with loads just like we all do, somethings more so than others!

A moments weakness.

A moments weakness.

As I whisper,
I wish you could hear me,
Be near me.
As I whisper,
Into a dark and desperate world
I am empty, in this great void.
I close my eyes, and dream
Of another world, another time,
Where you are mine.
As I whisper, into the lonely night
I wonder if I will ever catch sight,
Of my dreams in this reality,
Where darkness rules and light
Cowers, frightened in a corner.
As the darkness pulls me under,
The cold snuggling against my bones,
And my heart turns a frosted shade of black,
I wonder if you know, I want you back.